Beautiful Mature Skin Naturally? No Weird Old Trick required!

The advertisements for anti-wrinkle treatments that are popping up beside Triond articles keep catching my eye.

Society’s obsession with the quest for eternal youth stems from a biological desire to remain attractive to the opposite sex for fertility reasons. The media plays on our insecurities about ageing to sell us expensive products and sign us up for expensive cosmetic procedures. Old age in women is a bit of a taboo subject. Wrinkles, grey hair…God who still wants to take their photograph or have sex with them? Males in their later years go after the fast bikes and fertile young girls while the older females often become sexually disinterested and thus rejected. This is the cause for much conflict and it is neither party’s fault. Our bodies respond to our biology. A woman has her reproductive years and yet a man can go on producing sperm until he dies.

Men are like fine wines, they often improve with age. A well-established older man can attract a beautiful young female, even a not-so-well-off middle aged man can get a pretty youngster who is looking for a father figure or aspires to becoming a trophy girlfriend. However, the word ‘Cougar’ still makes us giggle and slightly cringe. People might go ‘phoar’ when they see an older man with a pretty young thing, other men will be envious, women curious, but when it comes to the older woman i.e. Madonna and her toyboy people consider that things are not right.

Older ladies get bad press. Somebody posed for the ‘before’ photograph in the anti-wrinkle advert. I mean, if somebody asked me to model ‘wrinkly 57 year old’ I’d punch them in the chops! Even worse, the woman used in the ‘after’ part of the advertisement isn’t even the same woman. She’s twenty five! It does make me wonder who falls for these ads and buys the products. Surely nobody believes that they can turn back the clock that far. No. The adverts operate on our subconscious on a deeper level, simply ‘wrinkles =shame.’

If we look at fairy tales woman are either youthful, virginal, desirable or witches and ugly sisters. There is no in between.

I have talked about the biological attraction of youth but do you choose to see the trickery and manipulation behind the anti-wrinkle, anti-ageing, anti-anything old incentive? I have chosen some photographs of older women around the world.

Going It Alone. Why Some Women Choose The Single Life

10 Reasons why some women choose the single life

1. Career. Some women choose to follow a career path rather than being involved in a relationship or family life. Women today have much more freedom to do this than their ancestors and there isn’t the pressure for them to marry for security that there was in the past. The advantages of single status in career women being that they do not have the distractions and potential emotional upsets that inevitably come with a relationship.
2. Illness. A woman who suffers from mental or physical illness may view herself as undesirable and therefore avoid the dating game. Something such as chronic depression or terminal illness can keep a woman single because she does not want to burden her partner. Women with contagious, life threatening diseases such as HIV and AIDS may also choose to be single for practical reasons.
3. Bad experience. This can be anything from experiencing an unhappy relationship between her parents, to becoming involved in physical or mental abuse form the opposite sex.
4. Commitment phobia. Both sexes can be commitment phobic, despite men getting most of the bad press! If it is not due to insecurity then it may simply be that the woman enjoys the chase, enjoys a life of promiscuity and does not want to settle down.
5. Some women have a low sex drive and/or are just not interested in men.

Death Row Romeo. Just What Is It About Women And Serial Killers?

(Image by Wiki)

Charming, charismatic and ….a serial killer. Have you ever wondered what it is that women see in these men? I was talking to a friend of mine two years ago who had recently pulled a girl in a nightclub. When he asked her what she was into she looked at him very seriously and replied ‘serial killers.’ She then proceeded to roll up her sleeve and show him her Ted Bundy tattoo.

The sweet pea Girl

Women have had this strange affinity with criminals for centuries. In 1895 William Durrant was on trial for a series of murders. A woman would turn up every morning and present him with a bouquet of Sweet Peas. Durrant wore one in his buttonhole while in court. The woman who became familiarly known as The Sweet Pea Girl was already married and her appearances at Durrant’s trial deeply troubled her spouse. She tried to see the accused in his cell but he refused.

Ted Bundy

Law student Ted Bundy who had sex with his victims after killing then had a following known as ‘Ted’s Groupies’. Bundy hated woman and wanted to kill them yet he was getting over two hundred letters a day from women who claimed they loved him.

John Wayne Cacy Jr.

Former children’s birthday party clown John Wayne Cacy Jr. killed thirty three boys and raped numerous others. He married a woman who was in denial about his killings.

Ramirez

Richard Ramirez was the dark and brooding type, a Satanist who was nicknamed ‘Death Row Romeo.’ He was nicknamed The Night Stalker after terrorising LA in 1985. Ramirez married a forty year old magazine editor with a BA in English Literature. She had sent him over seventy five letters until she was allowed to visit him in prison.

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The list of cases is endless. Now let’s put to bed a couple of assumptions.

1. These men are devastatingly attractive? In some cases yes, however Henry Lee Lucas (who had killed three hundred people) had a female following and yet he only had one eye!
2. The woman who fall for serial killers are bimbos? No. As we have seen from the case of Ramirez, his wife had a degree.

Power, a heady aphrodisiac.

Men who have killed repeatedly gain ‘celebrity’ status. At the time Ted Bundy was convicted of serial killings the media was full of his presence. Some people get turned on by power and celebrities who are in the public eye. Pop stars, news presenters and yes even killers regularly attain groupies and stalkers.

Psychological reasoning:

1. Attention seeking. The groupie may crave attention. Being involved in the life of a high profile figure also brings media attention onto them, as in the case of the Sweet Pea Girl.
2. Delusion. They are deluded that whatever the killer has done to other women, it won’t happen to them. They view themselves as ‘special’ or believe that they can ‘tame’ him. These women may have inflated egos or suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Another possibility is that the woman refuses to believe the crimes her ‘love’ has committed. Maxine Carr provided a false alibi for Ian Huntley after the murders of Holly and Jessica Chapman. She claims she genuinely believed he was innocent.
3. Past history. Such women have themselves perhaps been abused. The subconscious may draw them towards undesirable men who are similar to their father figure. They may subconsciously desire to be raped or killed due to learned patterns of behaviour. They may therefore deliberately put themselves in compromising situations.
4. ‘Safety’/control of destiny. Women with a history of sexual or physical abuse may favour men behind bars because they are ‘safe’. The woman can have a ‘relationship’ with the person without having to actually become intimate or live with them on a day to day basis. The woman has control over when she sees him. See it as a rather warped method of self-protection.
5. Danger. As Alexander Burke sang it ‘I’m drawn to danger and have been all of my life.’ What more is there to say?
6. Doing it for the thrill. The Drama Queen pursues a serial killer or dangerous man for the romance and excitement of unrequited love. They want what they can’t have and yet never actually get it together.
7. Maternal instinct. Waitress Dagmar Polson claims she fell for Bobby Lee Harris because ‘it was something in his eyes; remorse, the sadness. I was attracted and knew he was the one.’ Just as a mother is biologically drawn to a distressed child, some women are drawn to serial killers out of sympathy and maternal instinct. Polzin saw Lee Harris going through the repercussions of his actions and doubtless wanted to ‘save’ him.
8. OCD/chronic infatuation. Some women develop obsessions. Adoring a pop star and having his poster up in your room at school is normal behaviour, obsessing over a serial killer and sending him worn knickers is not healthy behaviour. Myra Hindley at the centre of The Moors Murders enquiry became infatuated with Ian Brady at the age of eighteen.
9. Low self-esteem/self-worth. A woman with a low opinion of herself may go after a dangerous man because he comes across as charming and she does not believe she can do any better.
10. Bonnie & Clyde Syndrome, also known as hybristophilia is sexual arousal or excitement brought about by associating with those who have committed acts such as rape and murder.
11. Borderline Personality Disorder. One of the key symptoms in cases of Borderline Personality Disorder is idealization. The patient has ‘black and white’ thinking and often exaggerates qualities and attributes in others.

ALONE WITH A DANGEROUS MAN

Is it always the woman’s weakness?

Perhaps it is the killer’s ruthlessness; their ability to manipulate, charm and seduce that excites even the sanest woman sometimes.